I dont remember saying "I do" ...

The other day I was discussing with my good friend, Hannah, how housesitting Scruffy could be likened to a bad marriage.

Note: I said bad marriage. I am not cynical or jaded in my views on marriage and I mean no disrespect to the state in general.

He snores all night and steals more than his fair share of the doona covers and then demands that I get out of bed and make him breakfast. I have to cook and clean for him and he never says thank you. If he wants something I have to drop whatever I am doing and attend to it or he will never shut up about it. He shows me no affection when I am not busy, but the instant I want to go out and spend some time with my friends he gets clingy and needy. He complains about my driving even though he is always wanting me to take him somewhere new. When we are out somewhere together, I have to be the strong one and protect him not the other way around. If I don't give him exactly what he wants for dinner he refuses to eat it. If we get a visitor he will completely ignore me and spend all his time with them, but he complains when I ignore him. He is constantly in the way when I am in the kitchen, and then seems to wonder why it is taking me so long to get him his dinner.

And I don't even get a shiny ring to show for it.